Something Buddhisty

I remember a time when I thought money was good.  I thought monetary wealth was important.  The idea of “selling out” was not necessarily bad – it depended on the price.  Money gave you security and happiness so everything else was second at best.  I had bought so far into that meme that it nearly drove me insane.  My life and mind were driven by caffeine and percoset through the week and alcohol on the weekend.  My obsession with bodybuilding was the only thing that kept me from going off the drug induced ledge of complete self-destruction.

I woke up one day and realized I was wrong.  What good is money when you hate life, hate doesn’t bring happiness and what is the point of security if you are miserable?  Money doesn’t bring happiness because it is transitory, it can only get you external things and it can do nothing to make your mind calm and peaceful.

I was faced with a trichotomy:

Continue going on the same way and die early of a heart attack or stroke, miserable all the way.

Finish what I started at 17 and off myself – no “Fade to Black” to save me this time.

Walk off into the woods and just sit with nature and wait to die.

None of these looked good to me but I didn’t know what else to do.  If I was in a state of depression I would have probably opted for option 3 but my mind felt clear and calm.  A state of equanimity was present, it seemed like a natural choice even more natural than deciding what’s for dinner.  I decided on a different option which didn’t appear at first, spirituality – not religion, religion is just part of the meme and it even has its own subset of memes.  I needed religion to find spirituality though or so I thought so I tried them and held option number 3 open just in case it didn’t work out.  I didn’t need religion to find spirituality I needed compassion and wisdom – I needed it from others and, most importantly, for others.  A different way, a middle way finally had been shown to me and peace finally became a possibility.

I look around the world today and see so many people buying into that meme of politics, societal norms, and materialism.  Not really their fault, it’s all they know just like it was all I knew.  The damage it does is on all levels from the rich to the poor.  The rich (winners in this meme) usually become spiritually destitute or the spirituality they do find is just leading them to more sensual pleasures or fame. (just look at all the headlines of how meditation can help you become more successful) Unfortunately the poor want to be like the rich or they want to blame the rich for the ills of this world – I was caught in that circle too – so many few want to be out of this circle and out of the meme.  I truly feel sorry for these people, not many know there is a different path in life and this path it makes no difference what your income, social status, or ethnicity is.

I am not fully out of the meme yet either, 30 some years of brainwashing will not go away with 8 years of practice.  I do know there is a way though and I have confidence in this path.  We need to realize that the chase after “things we simply do not need” needs to end, it is not the rich or the poor that is to blame – it is our desire.  How many people will point at the rich person and say it is their fault but yet spend money on what that person is offering even though it is not needed and barely wanted in some cases?

Maybe I’ve just come to the realization that it has to end for me soon, I see no point in most of the world anymore and have very little desire for money or advancement in my job or much of anything that is said to keep the world moving.  It’s not apathy, it just doesn’t make sense anymore. Or maybe I’m realizing that the time for that walk in the woods is coming much closer except this time instead of despair there will be freedom.

With Metta

Something Buddhisty

Well it’s easy to be a holy man on a mountain but hard as heck when you live in the real world.

We’ve all heard that many times.  I’ve even read something similar to that in a book once – it was called everyday Buddhism or something to that effect.  It’s not really true though, just the work it takes to live on the side of a mountain is very tiring – I know how tough it can be because many of my retreats are spent on the side of a mountain. In the sense that people usually refer to, the moral or wisdom sense, is very hard as well.  Sure there are fewer temptations and less people to deal with but there is always the mind.  It’s common to think that it must be easy to do or say the right thing when you aren’t in the thick of things. That might or might not be true.  What we usually miss or don’t understand is why that person has decided to be on the side of a mountain instead of in the swarm of society.

Those holy men aren’t on the side of the mountain to escape the world or because it is easier to deal with the “real” world when there is less of it. They see no point in what most would call the “real world”. If we actually looked deeply into the intent of our actions, that daily schedule we try so hard to fill, we would see how many of our activities are driven by plain desire.  We don’t want to feel unproductive so we fill that schedule up, don’t want to take the chance of being bored so we plan activities, we’ve actually gotten to the point that we plan things to do during rest time.  Most of these activities are completely unnecessary – many times this is done really to avoid ourselves.

I know many “Buddhists” who take their practice the same way…read books, listen to talks, watch videos for hours, but meditate only maybe once a week.  It is much harder to sit and watch just what is happening without interference or judgment than it is to be entertained in some way.

These holy men on the mountain, or monastery, or forest, are there because they realize boredom is just boredom, pain is just pain, pleasure is just pleasure, the experience is just conditional. Realizing this is just a stream of experience and trying to fully realize reality. When you start to see things as they truly are and not muddled by perception then you see that these conditional things do not bring happiness and all this chasing seems so pointless.  The point of what most call the real world is gone.

Maybe these holy men on the mountain are not there running away from the real world but are there to truly face it.

With Metta my friends

SB

A change of explaining the three defilements; instead of greed, anger, and delusion how about the term “partiality”.  Not my idea alone, many thanks goes to Venerable Phra Yuttadhammo.  The term makes sense though.  It is quite often misunderstood that intense craving or clinging is the cause of suffering (2^nd Noble Truth), well this is true but the misunderstanding comes in thinking that it isn’t any desire only the really intense ones.

It’s really any desire and that is where the term partiality comes in really well.  I was asked once when discussing the 4 Noble Truths where do the 3 kilesas (root defilements) come in to play.  Well we can look at greed/attachment as partiality for, anger/ill will as partiality against, and delusion as the mistake that either of these will bring us satisfaction or the mistake that we are not affected by these.  This explanation can bring us a clearer picture of the 2^nd Noble Truth.

Quite often we have heard the phrase “accept reality”.  Most people have a hard time with that because of the word accept, it sounds a lot like agreeance or approval and if we still see situations with perceptions we will see things we do not like or agree with.  So using the term partiality we can replace the phrase “acceptance of reality” with “observing what is without partiality either for or against what is”.  This kind of drops the whole agree with misunderstanding and pulls at the perception issue as well telling us to drop the perception of good or bad.  Reality isn’t good or bad it just is, our perception tells us good or bad depending on our partiality and that is what causes suffering.

With Great Metta,

SB

Last night someone asked a question about a couple of verses in the Dhammapada.  The verses being 11 and 12, shown below, the translation is different but the meaning is the same.

11. Those who mistake the unessential to be essential and the essential to be unessential, dwelling in wrong thoughts, never arrive at the essential.

12. Those who know the essential to be essential and the unessential to be unessential, dwelling in right thoughts, do arrive at the essential.

                                                                        – Acharya Buddharakkhita

The question was about what is essential, what is meant by essential.  The essential we can look at as the Dhamma.  We notice that the verses do say dwelling in wrong or right thought as well.  It brings to question how much time do we spend focusing on the unessential – sensual pleasures i.e. money, sex, violence, food, philosophical endeavors etc…  This doesn’t mean to abandon all those but compare that with how much time we devote to training the mind, to developing true wisdom, to developing the qualities that will lead us to true freedom.  Meditation is a huge key in seeing clearly where happiness is and isn’t.  Why do we need meditation? Well meditation takes us past perception and builds clarity of reality.  So just thinking will not get us there – thinking can be like data accounting, you can have all the right input but if your process is flawed you’ll still come out with incorrect results.  Just like our thinking, it is usually flawed by the defilements, clouding up our vision with greed, anger, or delusion, and our conclusion will be incorrect.

Keep meditating friends…seeing true reality is what will bring true happiness, even though the sting of desire hurts, let it drive you back to the cushion.

With All My Metta…and maybe send a little my way 🙂

SB

I’ve been getting into this bad habit lately of completing work but documenting it later.  In my defense some of this work needs to be documented at a later time just to avoid confusion – maybe two hours instead of two days but hey some days are more hectic than others.  At work the other day though I had a huge amount of that undocumented work that had to be documented so I open up the folder where I put it all at and to my pleasant surprise…only 4 items are there.  Then I remembered, the previous day I stayed a bit late to get it all done.  For the last two hours I had been dreading seeing the mass amount of work when I had already done it.  I was like “Thank you previous me!! You freakin rock!”.  Then I started thinking about my entire life.  I had a lot to thank myself for, my job is still stressful, there are still bills to pay, and I’m still a diabetic but there is a huge difference from 7 years ago to now.  Its not really easy to point to and say yep this was it or I learned this way to deal with these things.  It is more of a space that has been created – taking that glass of water to maybe the size of small pond so when the salt hits…the impact is much less.  I had to thank myself for staying with the Buddhist practice.  There is still a long way to go but thanking myself for all the hard work put in so far brings much more focus and energy to the practice.  I feel a much greater sense of gratitude for having the support of the Buddha, Dhamma, and Sangha.

Every time we experience something good or pleasant we can thank ourselves because something we’ve done has got us to that point.  We are so quick to put ourselves down when things seem bad so it should only be right to thank ourselves when things are better.  Better yet just meet the vicissitudes with equanimity

What in life can you thank yourself for?  There is definitely something there even if it is just getting through school so you know how to read and write.

With Much Metta friends, be thankful and joyous

Here is a pic of the deer that came by the cabin while I was on retreat last

The Miracle of the Sunrise….we miss it so often.  Probably because we think it will be there day after day.  Like everything of life it isn’t guaranteed.  Waiting can wait- get to it…the essential.

4am – Breepp Breepppp Breappp
Turn off the alarm, the cat meows and I agree with him to snooze for five more minutes.

4:05am – Breepp Breepppp Breappp
Turn off the alarm, the cat meows again, then a voice from the back of my mind says do not let this time pass by with sleep – I’ve heard the voice before, always infused with a twinge of guilt.  This time though there is a joyfulness to the voice, a realization almost of the time that is still available.

4:10 – Press play on the Blu Ray
Yoga to me, in the past, has been met with an attitude of this should be fun – 10minutes in and I’m wondering how much more I have to suffer through this torture.  Today – I can still move, I will still move – again a joyfulness arose with a realization of what is still available.

4:50 – On the cushion
Limber from yoga I sit solidly.  Feeling the heat that was generated from the yoga session, observation as it wanes – watching thoughts arise and fall with no effort – body sensations arise and pass – the I am slowly dissipates to just awareness of what is but not fully…..I breathe

5:25 – The bell rings
Eyes open and I feel gratitude

The day continues

Metta
SB