Saturday, November 22, 2008
Friday, November 21, 2008
End of us as in US as we know it
Clearly having been infiltrated and disinformationated by ex-Stasi operatives who were purchased at bargain basement prices about twenty years back, some dubious sounding fancy pants intelligence think tank going by the name of the National Intelligence Council (talk about your contradictions in terms) has predicted in a study they call “Global Trends 2025” that the United States of America as we know it, and we know it well, will pretty much have gone tango uniform by then.
Oh yeah? Well I’ve got my own dubious albeit unnamed sources, thank you (and special thanks to you, my psychic or psy-chick or sidekick spiritual teacher friend) and this is what’s really going down in 2025:
Peace in the Middle East will prevail (ha, ha, just joking). But there will be no more surgery with knives, honest. Axes will be used instead. Babies will be birthed in water all the time while utilizing music, incense and lavender lights. Not all of the babies will drown, either. We will live in robotic houses controlled by computerized sound wave-based switchboards which will all simultaneously crash mysteriously on December 12, 2024 and never ever let any of us back inside again, ever. No world war is coming, nor will it ever come to a nuclear holocaust, but on November 3, 2020 countless people are going to suddenly get really, really pissed off for no apparent reason and beat the you-know-what out of each other. Atlantis will begin to show itself by 2018 and be fully visible by 2022. Unfortunately, it will sink again in 2023 with millions of dumb asses who climbed on board, never to return again.
Put that in your global trend pipe and smoke it, my intelligence friends.
"Das internationale System, wie es nach dem zweiten Weltkrieg entstand, wird 2025 fast nicht mehr wieder zu erkennen sein."
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Oh yeah? Well I’ve got my own dubious albeit unnamed sources, thank you (and special thanks to you, my psychic or psy-chick or sidekick spiritual teacher friend) and this is what’s really going down in 2025:
Peace in the Middle East will prevail (ha, ha, just joking). But there will be no more surgery with knives, honest. Axes will be used instead. Babies will be birthed in water all the time while utilizing music, incense and lavender lights. Not all of the babies will drown, either. We will live in robotic houses controlled by computerized sound wave-based switchboards which will all simultaneously crash mysteriously on December 12, 2024 and never ever let any of us back inside again, ever. No world war is coming, nor will it ever come to a nuclear holocaust, but on November 3, 2020 countless people are going to suddenly get really, really pissed off for no apparent reason and beat the you-know-what out of each other. Atlantis will begin to show itself by 2018 and be fully visible by 2022. Unfortunately, it will sink again in 2023 with millions of dumb asses who climbed on board, never to return again.
Put that in your global trend pipe and smoke it, my intelligence friends.
"Das internationale System, wie es nach dem zweiten Weltkrieg entstand, wird 2025 fast nicht mehr wieder zu erkennen sein."
Kommentare auf Deutsch? Klar doch.
PS: We're not worthy, Joe. We're not worthy.The comments don’t always wirklich (really) work here, maybe try the second radio button if you want to reply, and you’ve got a website address or something.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Germans dissatisfied again already
Oh no, say it isn’t true. Not here. Not in Germany, of all places. Wow. How, uh, shocking or something. But, then again, the most shocking thing about the latest study concerning the German nation’s outlook on life in general and democracy in particular isn’t the fact that it is so negative and down and fatalistic and just plain pitiful (their outlook is always that way, otherwise they wouldn’t call themselves Germans - although this time it’s the most negative it’s been for about twenty years or so), no, the most shocking thing about this latest study is that anyone could possibly think to classify it as being news at all. Other than me maybe, I mean. But hey, somebody has got to do it, I think.
Generally/subjectively speaking, on a scale from 1 to 10, the “westerners” here average out at 5.5 and the “easterners” come in at 5. When it comes to being zufrieden (satisfied), I mean. Or when it comes to being unzufrieden (dissatisfied) I should say or if you prefer, which of course they, the Germans, always do.
And when it comes to this exotic foreign concept of “democracy” that everybody’s always trying to ram down their throats around here these days (you can’t export it, you know), Germans are even more unzufrieden. The westerners come in at about 5.2 (but they were occupied and brainwashed by “democrats” for decades so that doesn’t really count) while the easterners are consistent with the more real-world and accurate score of 3.9.
Otherwise, everything is hunky-dory though, I guess. The next study will be out soon. So don't say I didn't warn you.
„Ein besorgniserregend niedriges Niveau der Demokratiezufriedenheit."
Generally/subjectively speaking, on a scale from 1 to 10, the “westerners” here average out at 5.5 and the “easterners” come in at 5. When it comes to being zufrieden (satisfied), I mean. Or when it comes to being unzufrieden (dissatisfied) I should say or if you prefer, which of course they, the Germans, always do.
And when it comes to this exotic foreign concept of “democracy” that everybody’s always trying to ram down their throats around here these days (you can’t export it, you know), Germans are even more unzufrieden. The westerners come in at about 5.2 (but they were occupied and brainwashed by “democrats” for decades so that doesn’t really count) while the easterners are consistent with the more real-world and accurate score of 3.9.
Otherwise, everything is hunky-dory though, I guess. The next study will be out soon. So don't say I didn't warn you.
„Ein besorgniserregend niedriges Niveau der Demokratiezufriedenheit."
Kommentare auf Deutsch? Logisch.
The comments don’t always wirklich (really) work here, maybe try the second radio button if you want to reply, and you’ve got a website address or something.Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Greedy elitist punk
I mean punks. Mr. know-it-all Money Man Minister of Finance Pier Steinbrueck (SPD) thinks that the elitist-types in Germany (and in German parlance, in this context, that actually means “the wealthy”) are just too plain egotistic, self-serving and greedy. I couldn’t agree more, for once. After all, why should they be any different than the rest of the Germans out there? Elitists or not, I mean.
And to show the no-good punks just how mad as hell he really is, he’s going to give it to them big time by getting self-serving and greedy himself, albeit with other people’s money (and it will of course be money taken primarily from the non-wealthy-types) and double the planned national debt for the coming year, just like that, so there.
You just have to draw the line somewhere and show them who’s boss every once in a while, I guess. And set a good example and all that, I mean.
"Das Gerechtigkeitsgefühl der gesellschaftlichen Mitte wird durch die Entsolidarisierung der Besserverdienenden, den Egoismus und die um sich greifende Gier eines Teils der Wirtschaftselite schwer verletzt.“
And to show the no-good punks just how mad as hell he really is, he’s going to give it to them big time by getting self-serving and greedy himself, albeit with other people’s money (and it will of course be money taken primarily from the non-wealthy-types) and double the planned national debt for the coming year, just like that, so there.
You just have to draw the line somewhere and show them who’s boss every once in a while, I guess. And set a good example and all that, I mean.
"Das Gerechtigkeitsgefühl der gesellschaftlichen Mitte wird durch die Entsolidarisierung der Besserverdienenden, den Egoismus und die um sich greifende Gier eines Teils der Wirtschaftselite schwer verletzt.“
Kommentare auf Deutsch? Selbstverständlich.
The comments don’t always wirklich (really) work here, maybe try the second radio button if you want to reply, and you’ve got a website address or something.Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Green Obama, only different
Admittedly having a lot of striking similarities to President-elect Barack Obama drüben (over there) in US-America (an ethnic Turk with 60s sideburns, for instance, who was born and then raised in south-western Germany which is practically the same thing as Hawaii if you ask me and who never went to Harvard although he certainly would have liked to I bet and is nevertheless a Schnösel (snooty-nosed upstart) all the same having a musical, Obama-like, over-the-lips-rolling name, too) Cem Ozdemir has despite of this or maybe even because of this called comparisons of him to our American chosen one “inappropriate” as he is clearly not worthy, much less fit to wash his feet or something, or at least that’s what we’re supposed to think – at first.
And all of this after having been elected co-leader of the Green Party in Germany (they always travel in pairs over here for some reason). Calls from the ecstatic Green crowd of “Yes We Cem” were probably also inappropriate but who cares because this is history in the making again or something.
“Auffallend ist aber auch der über den Horizont normaler Aktionsfilme (Matrix - Wikipedia) hinausgehende philosophische Inhalt (wie Platons Höhlengleichnis, Gnostizismus, Zen-Buddhismus, die Analogie des Plots zum Neuen Testament der Bibel und dem Alten Testament der jüdischen Tanach).“
And all of this after having been elected co-leader of the Green Party in Germany (they always travel in pairs over here for some reason). Calls from the ecstatic Green crowd of “Yes We Cem” were probably also inappropriate but who cares because this is history in the making again or something.
“Auffallend ist aber auch der über den Horizont normaler Aktionsfilme (Matrix - Wikipedia) hinausgehende philosophische Inhalt (wie Platons Höhlengleichnis, Gnostizismus, Zen-Buddhismus, die Analogie des Plots zum Neuen Testament der Bibel und dem Alten Testament der jüdischen Tanach).“
Kommentare auf Deutsch? Klar doch.
The comments don’t always wirklich (really) work here, maybe try the second radio button if you want to reply, and you’ve got a website address or something.Monday, November 17, 2008
Opel back in again
Opel good car company, GM bad. And it’s not really Opel’s fault that it is a subsidiary of GM, after all. It got preyed upon or something. And now that everyone in, at and around Opel is making perfectly clear that not “one cent” of possible government loan guarantees would ever or even could ever be drained off from Opel to somehow prop up suffering US-American mother GM, Berlin is starting to think that financial aid to the troubled German carmaker might not be such a bad idea after all.
And after all (after all), Opel’s demise would mean about, well, 50,000 jobs. So although loudly warning potential “crisis freeloaders” that they will be wasting their time if they think they might be able to take advantage of the current situation to get something for nothing from this German government, that’s exactly what Opel is about to get. After today’s talks with Chancellor Merkel and company in Berlin, I mean.
“It is not the state's role to step in when consumer demand wanes.”
The comments don’t always wirklich (really) work here, maybe try the second radio button if you want to reply, and you’ve got a website address or something.
And after all (after all), Opel’s demise would mean about, well, 50,000 jobs. So although loudly warning potential “crisis freeloaders” that they will be wasting their time if they think they might be able to take advantage of the current situation to get something for nothing from this German government, that’s exactly what Opel is about to get. After today’s talks with Chancellor Merkel and company in Berlin, I mean.
“It is not the state's role to step in when consumer demand wanes.”
Kommentare auf Deutsch? Logisch.
Thanks for the economy link, Germany Within. And thanks for your link too, Lauren.The comments don’t always wirklich (really) work here, maybe try the second radio button if you want to reply, and you’ve got a website address or something.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Ursula K.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Putin making Germans dance again
A Russian invasion of Georgia long, long ago in August, gas supply cutoffs to several European countries after price disputes with Ukraine a year before that, and clearly dependent upon Russia for 30 percent of its natural gas needs already, EU countries, with Germany leading the pack, have once again expressed nothing but the greatest of confidence in Russian Puppet Master Prime Minister Vladimir Putin when it comes to his altruistic and “multilateral” Baltic Sea gas pipeline policy. Or they are just about to do so, I should say.
Going through the ritual motions of pretending to be able to say no to the RECTUM MAXIMUS (Russian Energy Czar Taunting Ultimate Macht (power)), EU lawmakers have called for an investigation into the pipeline’s environmental impact (Europeans would just hate to mess up the environment while selling themselves into Russian energy slavery, I guess). This angered RECTUM MAXIMUS however, and led him to threats that he may scrap the project. If Europe keeps delaying the pipeline, so RM, Russia might just build liquefaction plants instead, making Europe’s dependency even more expensive than it already is, and that's saying a lot, but then again, RM always does.
EU lawmakers will now be forced by Germany to waste no time to apologize profusely for this unfortunate misunderstanding and then explain in a groveling fashion that this itsy, bitsy little investigation of theirs won’t take all that long at all really as, for instance, Poland, Lithuania and Estonia won’t even have to be investigated in the first place as RM thought far enough ahead of time to have the foresight to have the pipeline bypass these pesky countries altogether, uh, in the first place to begin with already, already.
"The German government sees the pipeline as a central project to the future assurance of European and German gas provision," a spokesman for the Germany Economy Ministry said when officially asked about the pipeline as seen within the context of a central project to the future assurance of European and German gas provision.
So there we have it. Thank goodness Gerhard Schroder and co. have straightened all of this up for us again already already again.
"We cannot lower our environmental standards."
Going through the ritual motions of pretending to be able to say no to the RECTUM MAXIMUS (Russian Energy Czar Taunting Ultimate Macht (power)), EU lawmakers have called for an investigation into the pipeline’s environmental impact (Europeans would just hate to mess up the environment while selling themselves into Russian energy slavery, I guess). This angered RECTUM MAXIMUS however, and led him to threats that he may scrap the project. If Europe keeps delaying the pipeline, so RM, Russia might just build liquefaction plants instead, making Europe’s dependency even more expensive than it already is, and that's saying a lot, but then again, RM always does.
EU lawmakers will now be forced by Germany to waste no time to apologize profusely for this unfortunate misunderstanding and then explain in a groveling fashion that this itsy, bitsy little investigation of theirs won’t take all that long at all really as, for instance, Poland, Lithuania and Estonia won’t even have to be investigated in the first place as RM thought far enough ahead of time to have the foresight to have the pipeline bypass these pesky countries altogether, uh, in the first place to begin with already, already.
"The German government sees the pipeline as a central project to the future assurance of European and German gas provision," a spokesman for the Germany Economy Ministry said when officially asked about the pipeline as seen within the context of a central project to the future assurance of European and German gas provision.
So there we have it. Thank goodness Gerhard Schroder and co. have straightened all of this up for us again already already again.
"We cannot lower our environmental standards."
Kommentare auf Deutsch? Selbstverständlich.
The comments don’t always wirklich (really) work here, maybe try the second radio button if you want to reply, and you’ve got a website address or something.Search
"Was interessiert mich mein Geschwätz von gestern?"
Warning: This site contains real news turned fake or vice versa. All of it is true, however.
Native obsession of the day:
Global trends.
Hermann thinks that...
It's better to have a lousy future than no future at all.
Blogs Hermann might like (not)...
- anglofritz;
- Atlantic Review
- Beautiful German
- benperry.net
- Blog from Italy
- Books: Another Country
- Broke in Berlin
- Buchstaben in Bewegung
- Carnivorousness
- Chicago Boyz
- Cosima Underwater
- Das Unwort
- Davids Medienkritik
- Driftingfocus
- E-NOUGH!
- Expat Yank
- From The Word Go
- German for Runaways
- Germany Within
- Indeterminacy
- Iraqi Bloggers Central
- L.A. - Madrid Files
- letters
- Living in Germany
- Marxist By-Products
- Mausi
- Never Yet Melted
- ¡No Pasaran!
- Ohligarchy
- PI
- Planet Germany
- ProseKnitic
- P.S. from Germany
- Radio Free Mike
- Schoggo-TV
- Sistaweb
- Snooker in Berlin
- Staying Up All Night
- Stranded in Reality
- TAPMAG
- The Age of Treason
- Waygook Next Door
- What About Clients?
- What the heck?!
- You Bitch!
- You Heard Me!
Phrase these days:
“Das fiel ins Wasser."
Literal meaning:
That fell in the water.
In other words:
Those plans fell through.
Or better yet...
"The LORD is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him."
C'est lorsque nous sommes éloignés de notre
pays que nous sentons surtout l'instinct qui
nous y attache.
The negative views Germans hold vis-à-vis the United States are the accidental results of flawed reasoning, recklessly acquired erroneous judgments, well-intentioned but misguided teaching of parents and teachers, and unexamined acculturation. Of course the positve views are the result of that, too. But still.
Because giving makes you a better person.
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